Where is life taking me?

If you are normal in this life then I think you have asked yourself the following question: Where is life taking me? Maybe you asked yourself the question where am I going? What am I trying to do with my life? As Rick Warren put it, What on earth am I here for ? I think that this can be an appropriate statement and one we may need to explore. Today though I just want to write a little about life recently.

I have to start by saying that overall I think that I have had a very blessed life. I have been well taken care of in many ways and I cannot overlook that. I have been given the GIFT of experience in so many areas. I mean if I was measuring some of this in the worldly sense of success and failure the I might fall in the LOSER category. If you look at my resume I have successfully made a million dollars in a 5 year period in my 20’s and have nothing left to show for it. I have a foreclosure, I short sold a home for 335K less than I bought it for, I have a bankruptcy, I’m divorced, I have started my career over a few times, I currently do not make a ton of money, live in a small apartment and my family is close but not as much as we could be. What else may others say out there. They may say that I have the intelligence but lack the discipline. They may say that I don’t work smart enough. They may say that I do not invest enough into myself. They may say that I have a shoe habit that keeps me from going big. Some have and will continue to say that I struggle with depression. Some have said that I am a luke warm Christian and that is why I am experiencing luke warm results. If you really take a look at it on the surface none of this is false. I have failed many times over. I have made so many bad decisions. I fight my gut with my intellect. A constant tug of war. I’ve done things to fit in with the popular and that is not very popular. I have had limited exposure to male role models or mentors in my life. Often the males that have poured into my life had an ulterior motive. All of this and more has led me in a full circle to the initial question: Where is life taking me? 

I think about all that and I could easily simply think that I’ve failed. However, I think that I have been blessed with years of experience in a short period of time. Heck I am only going to be 37. I am in the best shape of my life. I know way more than I knew before. I have so many years left to do something with. My Grandfather just passed yesterday at 87. That means I would have at least 50 years left to make something of myself. The good news is I will not stop trying. You see I really think that I am being prepared for something Great. Its possible that I am already in the process of great and don’t even realize it. I think the few lessons that I am still too learn are: What are my measures of great and are those the right measures? Can I be PATIENT? Most of my failures have stemmed from being impatient. Making quick decisions without finding a place to follow my heart. Feeling pressured into a decision or making a decision because of the status and recognition it may bring. I think I am struggling with some of those very things today? I really have no clue where life is taking me. It throws me for a loop all the time. Again and again. Waiting for me to learn the toughest lesson of my life so far. The one that gives me hope. My personal rubiks cube. I have to learn what the difference between PATIENCE and COMPLACENCY. I have to learn that not all the work I am doing will directly relate to what needs to be done. I have to learn to create opportunity but not fabricate and force something for my own needs of recognition. I need to learn that none of this life is really about me at all.

I share this simply because I know that I am not alone. I share because I don’t have the answers yet but part of discovery is sorting through things. I share not because I need you too solve my struggles but because I have learned in life that we need too find those that think  alike and differently to challenge us and raise us up. We need to mastermind and elevate each other. I share because this is forum to mastermind with others. I share because that is who I am and this is how I grow.